Feels Like The First Time

While thinking on some inner band dynamic stuff goin on with the group I play in (we just had our first two gigs this month, after 5 months of practicing) it occured to me that the first gig of a band is akin in ways to the first time a couple has sex.

Like any scenario of cherries being popped, once a band (or a couple) go thru that, it changes everything -- People got all worked up beforehand, then in the act made themselves vulnerable, put their pride, ego, talent and ability on the line, then afterwards have all kinds of thoughts about how they performed, how it went over, worrying about what the other(s) thought of it, and then they start ruminating about all kinds of extra petty dramatic stuff afterwards -- An exagerated, hindsight laundry list of how they perceived the act/show really went over.

Suddenly all this personal stuff can come up about who thinks something about it should be more like this or that, who isn't delivering what's needed, who needs to ante up or back off, and most importantly, if this is going to continue, there's a whole bunch of other stuff (never brought up before, but obviously thought of all along) that now needs to be addressed before next time or someone's gonna quit.

Think about that angle the next time you hear a musician say "Oh yeah, bands are like relationships." If you're a musician, remember this after you play your first gig and see what conversations (unlike any had before the first gig) erupt.